When I was around 11 years old, I remember how I sat down on the staircase at home and started to cry. When my mum asked me why I was crying I replied: « I don’t know, Mum » All I knew was that there was a sadness.
Fast forward to 20 years later. I had moved to Thailand, given up my corporate career, and had decided to take care of my wellbeing. I studied Meditation and Reiki. And with all these practices I had a shocking revelation:
I was a God damn sponge for people’s problems and emotional rollercoasters. And the worst thing was: it didn’t even matter whether they told me about it or not. As a kid or young adult, I couldn’t differentiate what was mine and what wasn’t. When there was sadness in my house I cried. When someone felt angry, I felt angry too.
As an empath, I feel people’s emotional states. All. The. Time.
There are so many people like me out there, natural empaths, who are open to receive people’s vibes all around them. Usually it’s the people who are good listeners, the ones that always like to help out. Usually we are the introverted ones – and we are introverted precisely for this reason: being surrounded by too many people, crowds, energies is too overwhelming for us.
It can be a beautiful gift to be so open, but it can also be a curse when we don’t know how to deal with it.
When we don’t know how to handle it, we are sponges – we absorb people’s negative energy: their problems, their low vibes, or their negative emotions. We do this subconsciously, as mostly we are unaware of what we are absorbing.
However, tune into your body:
- How do you feel when you live in a house with depressed people?
- How do you feel when people in your office are tense, angry or nervous? Do you then also feel it in your body?
- How do you feel when your friends and family tell you all their problems, how do you feel once they leave? Do you feel deprived of energy? Do you feel low?
Chances are high you are absorbing their negativity.
Empaths do this, because deep down we are healers. We want to help people. We want them all to feel better. We want to cheer people up. Seeing people being depressed, angry or in any other low state of mind drags us down.
BUT: It’s not healthy for us to be this way. We need to learn how to help people without taking on their burden and their heavy weight. We don’t have to carry it for them. (We really don’t!)
You wouldn’t even believe what we carry for others:
- We absorb people’s negative emotions
- We carry our ancestors’ traumas (this was proven by epigenetics)
- We absorb our parent’s stories and the way they dealt with love, money, health, emotions etc
- And all of that on top of our own baggage, our own repressed memories and traumas and trapped emotions
Now, what happens when we are sponges?
Every negative emotion that is felt, is energy. Emotions are energy in motion. Energy flows freely and can flow from one person to another one. This is why we can empathise with others. This is why we might cry when we see someone who is also crying. We absolutely feel their emotional state.
I once worked with a client who had severe arthritis. Through the work we did I quickly became aware of what an open “sponge” she was. She absorbed everyone’s misery. Even when she was severely ill and weak, she still took the time to listen to all her friends’ problems.
There is only so much our body can take. Eventually we will get physically sick. Our body will react if we don’t learn how to shield ourselves better.
If you feel you have been absorbing a lot of negative energy and would like to learn how to shield yourself better, book yourself in for a complimentary 20 minute chat. I will check your energy psychically and tell you the 3 top things that are bringing down your energy.
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